? Friday, January 22, 2010
jus now 10plus went to lie on bed... been thru some....~ fall asleep arn 11plus.
Now im awake, n initially i tot i haf slpt very long ler, but no... whn i look into the time, is 1255am.
only 1hr plus had past.. y i seems like im haf slp very long le, now im so awake...
jus feel my eyes very "tiring" only, mind is so awake...
WAn to send msg to ppl de, but scare disturb dao, so i go on jes lappy n here i am, writing blog.
Audi really tempt me alot...
im very happy to see my own char. audi used to bring me many laughter, make me happy n i noe alot of frenz frm audi.. but now, i can't find the feel anymore... no more ler...
recently i say alot of sorry. which i really dun like to say out, especially to someone close.
i dun rmb saying sry to my parents/sis for the past 1/2 yr? even i do anything wrong, i also nv say. Sorry this word is something very impt n seldom will shoot out, especialy frm my mouth.
Except for this incident, really mus gathered some courage den sincerely apologise to her. n im really happy, tat i actually done it. Theres a song called "Sorry seems to be the hardest word"
today, I told my pig, we are drifting further apart.. (of coz something happen again, den i will say out tis de) All the while, i really cherish tis pig alot de.
Seriously, since the day i noe tis pig, til now, i nv change abit of my 'cherish'. even though, some times, i was being hurt? i also nv angry wif pig b4.
Feel toward pig is either sad or happy. No anger.
Today de thing, or last time de thing, or wateva happen before de thing, i dun wan to really say is whoes fault. but for tat invading pig personal privacy, i mus say, is all my fault.
Tears, i think tears is my best fren liao, kip appearing before me de~ last time smile is my best fren, but now tears has taken over smile position.
I wan to find back my bestie=smile.
I don't wan to lose anything=my family, my sis,my pig, my smile.
Can i have them all forever with me?
Pig say i lazy nv post blog... i wanting to tel pig, if u go read back all my 200+ plus i think more than 50% of my post is sad de.
Mainly i do blogging coz i haf things i wan to tel out, but i can't really do infront of ppl, coz i m those type who wun easily let ppl see my ;sob and i dun anyhow tel anyone.
Im not like other ppl, their diary is always happy occasion de, mine is abit more of my inner self.?
If not my blog title wun put Other Side of ^me.
wat i wrote here, tone, words, descriptions, is quite diff frm rl me.
Diff in the way tat, im not those who can express well in my speech, rl me i may seems to be a bo chap person, but actually im not.
Everything i will be concern..
Jes quite concern abt me tis time, although she duno wat happen, but she stil console me... last time whn she see i ;sob, she will not say anything to console me or wat de... Funny today, i play until my tears drop, den jes come on lappy, prepare for compy, she see my side view, ask me wat happen. i say nth wor.
then she stretch her head infront of me(block dao mine pc screen) n see my face den she ask me again, jie wat happen ar.
Lol, i see her face i also wan laugh, den i tel her, bu yao chao wo(do not disturb me).
i think i wan say de things, i told pig today le.. hope pig really understand wat i trying to say, n how i feel. Same.. no matter wat, i wun leave u alone de, last time i wun, now i wun, future also wun. Hope u can help to pull me~ dun do things which always push me furtherrrr ler hao ma
**wink wink** ^_^ ;mua
I LOVE EUU. 12:57:00 AM
